Riggidy Raow wrote:
... inspired by some shit that Complex wrote...
I Frequently spend time massaging my pen
Letting it know the ink and I are possibly kin
Eager to spill the wine across the realms of pages
Allowing thoughts to flow off as the hand engages
Could pursue this as commercial – lettin’ wealth be tool
But “This above all: to thine own self be true”
I really liked this bar, the only part I didn't like was wealth be tool. You could have came up with a slightly more articulate way of stating that.
To be fluent in one’s ode, you must love reality
Instead you conjure up thoughts of a thug mentality
In God, do you believe? You can’t erase the proof
You’ll never find yourself until you face the truth
Real good line. Though I don't agree with it.
Look out at the stars - is mine aligned with Saturn?
Blah - Gather my notebook and adjusted my pattern
Seems metaphorical.
Uninvolved with the world, it’s only half the picture
I glance down at the pad and get back to scriptures
All these rambling thoughts - finally become weaved
Entangled up in my words makin’ it hard to breath
I know longer see the paper, cant even feel the quill
Caught up in this ritual - yet it’s against my will
The Flow – should I seduce it or use it’s strength
The Lyrics – should I continue or reduce the length
The Words – would it be wrong if I decide to write’em
Damn, what’ll manifest out of this self asylum
Now this right here is real original and dope. I could see you weaving them lines into just about any song.
Greiving over this madness, my heart seemed to stop
Oh – shit what’s the title? I can’t complete my thoughts
Nice.
Release the ramifications. This mind game’s diluted
All this to be posted so that others dispute it
And here you have it! Isolated in my own world within
Riggz you almost didn’t make it… and yet I’ll do it again
I liked this. I do like how you mixed the metaphors with writing, hip hop and life. That is complicated to do, and takes a certain freeness of thought to complete.
Overall. I'd say this was real good. If you increased the amount of time you spent on it, it might have been better, but it was fluid, had substance and was inspired by me. I can't complain that much.
