ok thanks for the tip and just so you guys don't get the wrong idea, this rap isn't about my Dad but for others who are dealing with this kind of pain. I'm just taking their place and using my lyrics to speak out their emotions.

Damn man nice multi's and vivid imagery.

yea i agree it's a bit simple but i think you got good flow. Just try using more vocab.

oh alright

-- Sat Jun 25, 2011 8:43 am --

http://www.illestlyrics.com/board/hot-f ... 21063.html
http://www.illestlyrics.com/board/walk- ... ml#p175606

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Qp_RklNtFeg (listen to this song while reading my lyrics)

(start at 0:29)
Just give me one mic, one chance, but i never got it
Always pushed around and called an idiot
Always getting hit, all alone stuck in this endless pit
Came out my moms' stomach..but don't treat ...