Welcome to Illest Lyrics forum established in 2005.
----
Free Vapes
----
Free Vapes
ILLEST PODCAST # 4
Moderator: Loon E Lou
-
Sweet Joe
- a.k.a. Shalashaska
- Posts: 107
- Joined: Sat Feb 10, 2007 6:08 am
- Wins: 2
- Losses: 0
- Location: Chi-Town
oh and believe me that mother fucker does look like shrek with autism.
Last edited by Sweet Joe on Wed Feb 14, 2007 12:16 pm, edited 1 time in total.
"Peace through animosity, this is classified as, Blind Hypocrisy."
~She Likes Todd
"If country had a vagina, it would be the Dixie Chicks."
~Jon Boy in Hi-Fi
~She Likes Todd
"If country had a vagina, it would be the Dixie Chicks."
~Jon Boy in Hi-Fi
-
Sweet Joe
- a.k.a. Shalashaska
- Posts: 107
- Joined: Sat Feb 10, 2007 6:08 am
- Wins: 2
- Losses: 0
- Location: Chi-Town
how about this.
A Scottsman, a Chinaman, a Pom and an Aussie were in the pub debating whose country was the best.
The Scottsman reckoned his was the best, because we got the greenest grass.
The Pom reckoned his was the best because they had the most beautiful flag.
The Chinaman reckoned his was the best because of their Great Wall.
The Aussie said we're the best, 'cos we got the kangaroo, and that can jump over your great wall, crap on your grass and wipe it's ass with your flag!
A Scottsman, a Chinaman, a Pom and an Aussie were in the pub debating whose country was the best.
The Scottsman reckoned his was the best, because we got the greenest grass.
The Pom reckoned his was the best because they had the most beautiful flag.
The Chinaman reckoned his was the best because of their Great Wall.
The Aussie said we're the best, 'cos we got the kangaroo, and that can jump over your great wall, crap on your grass and wipe it's ass with your flag!
"Peace through animosity, this is classified as, Blind Hypocrisy."
~She Likes Todd
"If country had a vagina, it would be the Dixie Chicks."
~Jon Boy in Hi-Fi
~She Likes Todd
"If country had a vagina, it would be the Dixie Chicks."
~Jon Boy in Hi-Fi
-
Sweet Joe
- a.k.a. Shalashaska
- Posts: 107
- Joined: Sat Feb 10, 2007 6:08 am
- Wins: 2
- Losses: 0
- Location: Chi-Town
ok last one for tonight, ill save them for the podcast.
An American decided to write a book about famous churches around the world. So he bought a plane ticket and took a trip to Orlando, thinking that he would start by working his way across the USA from South to North.
On his first day he was inside a church taking photographs when he noticed golden telephone mounted on the wall with a sign that read "$10,000 per call". The American, being intrigued, asked priest who was strolling by what the telephone was used for.
The priest replied that it was a direct line to heaven and that for $10,000 you could talk to God. The American thanked the priest and went along his way.
Next stop was in Atlanta. There, at a very large cathedral, he saw the same golden telephone with the same sign under it. He wondered if this was the same kind of telephone he saw in Orlando and he asked a nearby nun what its purpose was.She told him that it was a direct line to heaven and that for $10,000 he could talk to God. O.K., thank you," said the American. He then travelled to Indianapolis, Washington DC, Philadelphia, Boston, and New York. In every church he saw the same golden telephone with the same "$10,000 per call" sign under it.
The American, upon leaving Vermont decided to travel to AUSTRALIA to see if Australians had the same phone. He arrived in Australia, and again, in the first church he entered, there was the same golden telephone, but this time the sign under it read "40 cents per call." The American was surprised so he asked the priest about the sign.
Father, I've travelled all over America and I've seen this same golden telephone in many churches. I'm told that it is a direct line to Heaven, but in the US the price was $10,000 per call. Why is it so cheap here?"
The priest smiled and answered, "You're in Australia now, mate - it's a local call".
An American decided to write a book about famous churches around the world. So he bought a plane ticket and took a trip to Orlando, thinking that he would start by working his way across the USA from South to North.
On his first day he was inside a church taking photographs when he noticed golden telephone mounted on the wall with a sign that read "$10,000 per call". The American, being intrigued, asked priest who was strolling by what the telephone was used for.
The priest replied that it was a direct line to heaven and that for $10,000 you could talk to God. The American thanked the priest and went along his way.
Next stop was in Atlanta. There, at a very large cathedral, he saw the same golden telephone with the same sign under it. He wondered if this was the same kind of telephone he saw in Orlando and he asked a nearby nun what its purpose was.She told him that it was a direct line to heaven and that for $10,000 he could talk to God. O.K., thank you," said the American. He then travelled to Indianapolis, Washington DC, Philadelphia, Boston, and New York. In every church he saw the same golden telephone with the same "$10,000 per call" sign under it.
The American, upon leaving Vermont decided to travel to AUSTRALIA to see if Australians had the same phone. He arrived in Australia, and again, in the first church he entered, there was the same golden telephone, but this time the sign under it read "40 cents per call." The American was surprised so he asked the priest about the sign.
Father, I've travelled all over America and I've seen this same golden telephone in many churches. I'm told that it is a direct line to Heaven, but in the US the price was $10,000 per call. Why is it so cheap here?"
The priest smiled and answered, "You're in Australia now, mate - it's a local call".
"Peace through animosity, this is classified as, Blind Hypocrisy."
~She Likes Todd
"If country had a vagina, it would be the Dixie Chicks."
~Jon Boy in Hi-Fi
~She Likes Todd
"If country had a vagina, it would be the Dixie Chicks."
~Jon Boy in Hi-Fi
-
complexity
- Elevated
- Posts: 9699
- Joined: Mon Jan 02, 2006 9:09 am
- Wins: 48
- Losses: 15
- Location: Maine
- Contact:
Who is online
Users browsing this forum: No registered users and 3 guests