Hip Hop Forum

You can’t go around fixin’ problems when you aren’t quite fixed yourself.
He said.
Sooner or later, everything you have ever built
Will
Come
Crashing
Down
On
Top
Of
You…

I could tell he knew what he was talking about by the way he held his hammer.
Like my attention… beaten to death.
I can’t focus on these broken homes “Mr. Fix Everything”
So give me a break…
Or give me understanding.
Cut me out
Or glue me in.

They say “home is where the heart is”
…When I can’t find your love it leaves us both homeless.
I cut, collected and counted the days that passed after you left.
That’s 7,665 days
Or
183,960 hours.
I keep them all right here… In my heart.

I’m using them to build us a castle in the sky.
So, bring yourself.
Bring your love.
And come on up.

I’m not quite fixed but I’m working on my problems.
The foundation is set, our love isn’t fully built
Here yet but… pop’s I want you to know.

I’ve attached a rope from our roof to the sun.
So when everything I have ever built comes crashing down.
We can let it all fall...
And keep our love from ever hitting the ground.

-- Fri Mar 26, 2010 5:59 am --

Hmmm

They say “home is where the heart is”
…When I can’t find your love it leaves us both homeless.

I’ve attached a rope from our roof to the sun.
So when everything I have ever built comes crashing down.
We can let it all fall...
And keep our love from ever hitting the ground.

ur a fucking poet my dude...i mean that in the best of ways...u deep sun... u should write a book similar to the tower series..always enjoy reading ur drops duke

this was pretty dope... talkin to ur dad right? maybe... i dunno... newayz it was hella deep bruh good read... real good job man

now GO MOW THE LAWN!!!! lol

maaaan. im tellin ya. u got dope stories dawg. ur shit is so dope, i can bag it up and sell it. haha. na but really this was ku. i liked it

Thanks for the feed playa's

[ Post made via Mobile Device ]

this was some deep shit on the real mayne i didnt think you were this good at writin poetry i thought yeah he'll be nice but damm dope shit mayne i'm a keep my eyes out for more

told him to fix himself








but this was a purdy nice piece
it's written differently but has that vibe
that vibe that makes you want to read it again
my bad for taking so long.....did it for the lulz

I'm feelin' this tho'! write another!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Thanks for the feed ya'll I preciate it.

I could tell he knew what he was talking about by the way he held his hammer.
Like my attention… beaten to death.
I can’t focus on these broken homes “Mr. Fix Everything”
So give me a break…
Or give me understanding.
Cut me out
Or glue me in.

That Just Seems Like A Dad Wanting A Son 2 Pay Attention, I Like How You Captivated The Reader's Interest Here Which Made It An Expensive Piece. Also

You can’t go around fixin’ problems when you aren’t quite fixed yourself.
He said.
Sooner or later, everything you have ever built
Will
Come
Crashing
Down
On
Top
Of
You…

I Enjoyed The Structure Of Haiku 2 Explain The Emotion Of The Drop. Dope I Say... Dope!!

Very Outstanding Riposte, I Look Forward 2 Viewing Your Pieces in Public Libraries One Day.

Word

[ Post made via Mobile Device ]

-- Sun Apr 17, 2011 3:02 pm --

Uppin

Damn cn really relate to this...n Wut structure ...beautifully put together ..understandable ...made me read it a couple more times lol...nice drop

[ Post made via Android ]

this shit was DOPE i could relate to some of this shit. keep the poems coming