Hip Hop Forum

(intro) Aight peeps, I know this one is kinda long, but we all came together to lay this out for the site as our first crew collaboration, so if you take the time to read this, then all five of us would appreciate some feed of your favorite lines or whatever... Thanks for reading and we hope you enjoy!!!

Kuhlerblynd - blue
IntrinsicCadence - green
Orfadox - dark blue
Kau the Lion - red
Illaborate - bold white

Collectively Ill like a zombie communion, coming together for a union
Of minds that are designed to be doper than any drugs that you are usin' //
Let's clear some confusion, I'm Mr. Murk aka the nasty one
Always smoking on blunts, just pass me one, and fuckin bitches above class E son //
A propane tank, don't try to gas me none, or spark's fly til the blasting's done
More heat than a Roger Clemens fastball, and ya'll can't come bat me once //
Been thru hell and back, these feet looking like charcoal should tell you that
Pushin all the envelopes for my stamp of approval just so I can mail it back //
Lyrics that buy your favor, then I sell it back, cuz the Collective doesn't seek approval
Like kids acting up in class, we'll remove you, any fucking second we choose to //
Keeping it real from here to Boston, often making rappers soften like cotton
I'll paint de feet in blood like your ankles are hugged by Red Sox when I march in //

These Collectively Ill cats, are spittin' some real raps, so listen to feel that
Cuz we peel back your mind to insert a vision inside that can heal the whack.//
I'm the one to say I.C., cuz my Cadence comes from me, with Intrinsic rhythm schemes,
and my fate is to achieve- greatness cuz I'm true in deed, take this as promised dream//
I can paint this fluid beat, without hatin'-or-fakin' so take a seat, and let my ink sink deep,
'till your anchored in my sea, feelin' my flow in the breeze, cuz I'm the realist you'll ever see//
I'm dealin' with life with noble eyes, holdin' my head high- while I walk these dead streets,
I'm caught inside time- with plots in my mind- to wake the deceased from their sleep//
I keep deceit far from my philosophy, even if it keeps me- buried underneath the mainstream,
cuz I ain't free- unless I'm livin' with authenticity and blessin' these beats with the best of me//
So I stay true through everyday's maze, blazin' the way for change and aimin' at you,
cuz no matter where you wear your noose, if you ain't livin' true than who are you to break loose//

Collectively Ill We Drop This Sick Shit Keep Ya Eyes Wide Cos If Ya Blink You'll Miss This
And End Up Burnt Like Witches So We Imbedding The Name In Ya Brains So It Sticks With You Bitches
You Couldnt Hit This If We Were Punchbags So Sit Back And Just Admire The Sick Drops
Leave Ya Addicted Like We Was Feeding Ya Rocks Cos Its Murk,Kau,Illaborate,Cadence And Me Dox
So If Ever Ya Bored Get Reading Our Shit Cos We Be Sicker Than Any Hospital Ward
Pretending Ya Dont Like This But We Be Like Heroin When We Leave Ya'll Begging For More
Cos Every Time I Drop In The Scriptures The Whole Place Goes Quiet Like Meditation
This Shit Is Fly Cos We End Up Leaving Ya'll Feeling So High You Could Call This Shit Levitation
More Intresting To Read Than Oliver So You Should Start Calling This Shit Dickens
Cos We Ignite The Flames Make You Remember The Name Cos We Be Bringing Fire To The Writtens
So All Thats Left To Say Is Dont Forget This Name Cos We Be Collectively Ill
So Sit Enjoy The Drops And The Collabs And Dont Forget To Start Respecting The Skill

The Collectively Ill, the crew that's lyrically quarantined.
Don't broadcast in the fashion of your friendly news morning team.
More than it seems, more than you hear like ultrasonic frequencies.
Easily, got the freshest faces you're ever facing on a team with me.
Kau the Lion, got the call of the wild, involved timing
With raw rhyming to spit the sound of silence like Paul Simon.
Let me expand and elaborate: our cadence is nasty but unorthadox,
We're here to elevate and educate, we don't do it for the props.
We're here to start a movement. Doing it for the students,
Who need a fine rhyme lesson and less of them whack rap rudiments.
So bring your hardest selection, we bounce it back like a reflection.
Cause we can do anything with our minds in the collection.

Before we start... I'll admit my raps are plain, so you’ll listen and have to hate/
But I write from the heart, so Illaborate couldn’t be silenced with a cache of masking-tape//
We got Murk McNasty, maann he put the move into movement/
He’ll craft his art into a bomb, light the fuse and BOOM.. music//
(It’s moving.)
Moving on to Orfadox the kid is hot, his written drops resemble kettle pots/
With welded tops, heat him up and the pressure with never stop//
Kau the Lion, aint lying, he’s a jungle-cat, spittin thunder-raps/
I wouldn’t rumble-that, approach and find you’re head where you’re trunks-are-at//
IntrinsicCadence dam kid is creative, inna snap craft a rap that’ll clash like a train-wreck/
Put heaven in his lyrics found a way to contain it, ask for an image and in an instant he’ll paint-it//
Throw us all together, you get collectively Ill, then add a dash of connected with skill/
Our rhetoric kills, pens and pads be the ONLY weapons we wield//

Mad drop from tha Collective....way too long to break it down but I don't have anythin negative to say about it anyways...

Kau's and IntrinsicCadence best verses guys....keep on droppin that Collective ill shit....

murk -

A propane tank, don't try to gas me none, or spark's fly til the blasting's done
More heat than a Roger Clemens fastball, and ya'll can't come bat me once //

i love that combat me once line, sick shit, your verse was pretty solid, flow seemed rocky in some areas but the best lines were smooth


sic -

nice use of words, felt your verse to be the most unique, the flow was steady, the rhymescheme definitely needs improvement though, be some masterful shit if u worked and perfected the multis, overall a decent verse


dox -

you had a nice intro and outro, i see the improvement in your rhymescheme, the verse itself was koo

kau -

short and easy to read, sometimes simplicity works best, in this case it did its justice, flow was rough in some spots but overall there's not much to hate

illaborate -

definitely did not expect this from you, probably my favorite verse, definitely enjoyed reading this, intro immediately grabbed my attention and u followed through with the rest, big props to u


overall- this crew can definitely do some damage, murk u doin a great job with this, illaborate holdin his own n personally i felt he outshined the other dudes but together u guys pretty much cover every element of text, nice to see the different styles, good shit CI, hopin to see more from you all

Thanks for the feed and I like seeing that we have 40 views on this so far.

I think everyone did their part to open it out, and I like the result. All of these guys had their own element and tried to bring it together into one thought, so I was glad to be a part of it. We're working on shorter bar counts on our next collabs...

Thanks For The Feed Guys....I Know Its A Bit Long And Half Of Ya Cant Be Fucked To Read It Aha

Dope blend of styles ya got here I was feelin most of the shit especially Kau and Ill's verses. I'm glad y'all brought a different style cause I ain't really wanna read a 5 person drop fulla multi madness or a drop fulla monotonous punches but when it came to reppin yourselves individually and as a team y'all had the right ingredients.

Murk was a great opener.

The whole flow was sprinkled with nice rhymes.

I love how you led your crew by starting off too, very professional.

Favorite bar

"Pushin all the envelopes for my stamp of approval just so I can mail it back //"


IntrinsicCadence

Original wording. Great flow.

A thoroughly enjoyable verse.

Not ground breaking by any means, but still a good read.

Favorite Bar

"These Collectively Ill cats, are spittin' some real raps, so listen to feel that
Cuz we peel back your mind to insert a vision inside that can heal the whack.//"

Orph

I disagree with JJ.

Thought you held up your end up the bargain.

When you were writing more straight forward bars with less rhymes it came off a lot nicer.

Favorite Bar:

"Cos Every Time I Drop In The Scriptures The Whole Place Goes Quiet Like Meditation
This Shit Is Fly Cos We End Up Leaving Ya'll Feeling So High You Could Call This Shit Levitation"

Kau the Lion

You really bodied this shit.

Stepped up your game big time.

Favorite bars:

"Kau the Lion, got the call of the wild, involved timing
With raw rhyming to spit the sound of silence like Paul Simon.
Let me expand and elaborate: our cadence is nasty but unorthadox,
We're here to elevate and educate, we don't do it for the props."

Illaborate

Thought your opener was sick.

Favorite bars:

"Throw us all together, you get collectively Ill, then add a dash of connected with skill/
Our rhetoric kills, pens and pads be the ONLY weapons we wield//"

===============

Overall. I thought Murk started off this collab perfectly and Illaborate closed it perfectly.

For the most part a very fluid collaboration. First super-collab that we've seen in a while, it was cool.

Too long to drop individual line breakdowns but heres a general..

Murk -

Nice multies. Flow was on point for the most part. Mostly general with nothing standing out too much but it's a rep track so thats expected. I'm feelin' ya intro bars the most. Nice way to open the collab up.

Cadence -
Very poetic verse that put the reader in your eyes. I'm feelin' your intro the most as well. Thought the flow was a bit choppy in some spots and you was off again and then on again with multies. You have a nice structure in the way you deliver verses but I would concentrate in wording my multies, since I seen a few I'm assuming you want to deliver that way. Either way, nice verse.

Dox -
Thought you dropped a nice verse.
Cos Every Time I Drop In The Scriptures The Whole Place Goes Quiet Like Meditation
This Shit Is Fly Cos We End Up Leaving Ya'll Feeling So High You Could Call This Shit Levitation
probably your best bar IMO. I didn't care to much for the opening line in the next bar but enjoyed how you closed it. Only thing to pick at is you seemed like you were trying to hard to stay on topic with it being a crew collab that it came to the point that you were throwing lines in. I've seen your topicals so I know you can up the creativity more. Overall, a nice verse though.

Kau -

I thot your verse stood out above the others. Really enjoyed your vocab and thought the flow was nice. You structured your bars in a way that your use of rhyme scheme and multies really stood out.

Ill -

Thought your verse was decent but wished you concentrated more on yourself instead of inserting everyone else in the crew. They had their time to spit and introduce theirselves. Either way, I thought you did pretty well and had a decent verse. Your opening bar was strongest IMO.

Overall - Good collab. Everyone did well and the style you write in is different which complimets the others. Glad to feed anything else yall assemble. & Nice idea on the crew

1

Thanks much for all the feed. Everyone gave some real constructive criticism and I think I speak for the crew when I say it is much appreciated and will be strongly considered when we drop our next collaboration.

Edit: Especially Yezzir who gave one hell of a break down on an especially long piece.

Collectively Ill like a zombie communion, coming together for a union
Of minds that are designed to be doper than any drugs that you are usin' //

Smooth Flow, smooth start.

Let's clear some confusion, I'm Mr. Murk aka the nasty one
Always smoking on blunts, just pass me one, and fuckin bitches above class E son //

ok

A propane tank, don't try to gas me none, or spark's fly til the blasting's done
More heat than a Roger Clemens fastball, and ya'll can't come bat me once //

lol would put kanye's voice to this.

Been thru hell and back, these feet looking like charcoal should tell you that
Pushin all the envelopes for my stamp of approval just so I can mail it back //

Good imagery, Good secondline.


Lyrics that buy your favor, then I sell it back, cuz the Collective doesn't seek approval
Like kids acting up in class, we'll remove you, any fucking second we choose to //

Uh huh

Keeping it real from here to Boston, often making rappers soften like cotton
I'll paint de feet in blood like your ankles are hugged by Red Sox when I march in //


No.

These Collectively Ill cats, are spittin' some real raps, so listen to feel that
Cuz we peel back your mind to insert a vision inside that can heal the whack.//


Wasn't feeling

I'm the one to say I.C., cuz my Cadence comes from me, with Intrinsic rhythm schemes,
and my fate is to achieve- greatness cuz I'm true in deed, take this as promised dream//

ok

I can paint this fluid beat, without hatin'-or-fakin' so take a seat, and let my ink sink deep,
'till your anchored in my sea, feelin' my flow in the breeze, cuz I'm the realist you'll ever see//

Picking it up..
-
I'm dealin' with life with noble eyes, holdin' my head high- while I walk these dead streets,
I'm caught inside time- with plots in my mind- to wake the deceased from their sleep//

decent

I keep deceit far from my philosophy, even if it keeps me- buried underneath the mainstream,
cuz I ain't free- unless I'm livin' with authenticity and blessin' these beats with the best of me//

Like the free concept & how it tied in, N i see the inner rhymes but they could of been stringed together better.


So I stay true through everyday's maze, blazin' the way for change and aimin' at you,
cuz no matter where you wear your noose, if you ain't livin' true than who are you to break loose//

ok.


Collectively Ill We Drop This Sick Shit Keep Ya Eyes Wide Cos If Ya Blink You'll Miss This
And End Up Burnt Like Witches So We Imbedding The Name In Ya Brains So It Sticks With You Bitches

Good start.. seeing the build up

You Couldnt Hit This If We Were Punchbags So Sit Back And Just Admire The Sick Drops
Leave Ya Addicted Like We Was Feeding Ya Rocks Cos Its Murk,Kau,Illaborate,Cadence And Me Dox

Ok

So If Ever Ya Bored Get Reading Our Shit Cos We Be Sicker Than Any Hospital Ward
Pretending Ya Dont Like This But We Be Like Heroin When We Leave Ya'll Begging For More

lol Good Flow , both lines played concepts. But you made them work well.

Cos Every Time I Drop In The Scriptures The Whole Place Goes Quiet Like Meditation
This Shit Is Fly Cos We End Up Leaving Ya'll Feeling So High You Could Call This Shit Levitation

So high levitation < again played. lol I Like the first line

More Intresting To Read Than Oliver So You Should Start Calling This Shit Dickens
Cos We Ignite The Flames Make You Remember The Name Cos We Be Bringing Fire To The Writtens

Yeah

So All Thats Left To Say Is Dont Forget This Name Cos We Be Collectively Ill
So Sit Enjoy The Drops And The Collabs And Dont Forget To Start Respecting The Skill

Good Finish man.


The Collectively Ill, the crew that's lyrically quarantined.
Don't broadcast in the fashion of your friendly news morning team.

Good start.

More than it seems, more than you hear like ultrasonic frequencies.
Easily, got the freshest faces you're ever facing on a team with me.

Smooth flow, good multis

Kau the Lion, got the call of the wild, involved timing
With raw rhyming to spit the sound of silence like Paul Simon.

LOL. I like this

Let me expand and elaborate: our cadence is nasty but unorthadox,
We're here to elevate and educate, we don't do it for the props.

Weaving the words together nicely.

We're here to start a movement. Doing it for the students,
Who need a fine rhyme lesson and less of them whack rap rudiments.

No

So bring your hardest selection, we bounce it back like a reflection.
Cause we can do anything with our minds in the collection.

Finished well.

Before we start... I'll admit my raps are plain, so you’ll listen and have to hate/
But I write from the heart, so Illaborate couldn’t be silenced with a cache of masking-tape//

Good start

We got Murk McNasty, maann he put the move into movement/
He’ll craft his art into a bomb, light the fuse and BOOM.. music//
(It’s moving.)

Nice

Moving on to Orfadox the kid is hot, his written drops resemble kettle pots/
With welded tops, heat him up and the pressure with never stop//

n the plot thickens... lol

Kau the Lion, aint lying, he’s a jungle-cat, spittin thunder-raps/
I wouldn’t rumble-that, approach and find you’re head where you’re trunks-are-at//

No

IntrinsicCadence dam kid is creative, inna snap craft a rap that’ll clash like a train-wreck/
Put heaven in his lyrics found a way to contain it, ask for an image and in an instant he’ll paint-it//

Good

Throw us all together, you get collectively Ill, then add a dash of connected with skill/
Our rhetoric kills, pens and pads be the ONLY weapons we wield//

Like the connected with skill<< good finish. def killed it.


the last 2 people real did a good job getting the objective done.

Everyone did pretty good, theres always room for improvement but you'll eventually all help each other with that..

Good collab, Keep dropping.

Thanks to everyone who is throwing us feed and helping to expand our horizons with their ideas and perspectives. Thats EXACTLY what this crew is about, and what we are here for. This is why we came together. All of this is very much appreciated. Thanks to every single one of you that took the time to even read this lengthy piece.

Word

[ Post made via Mobile Device ]

i think the next time you all collaborate as a 5+ man group i'd shorten the bars, definitely was a long read even though it was good a lot of people hate taking so much time out of their day lol, just some advice for next time, keep at it CI

Thanks For The Feed Got Some Comments That Will Help Me Improve I Think




And Thanks Guys For Taking The Time To Read This

Uppin'.. Appreciate the read and the feed ya'll, especially those of you who took the time to really break it down and give well thought out feedback. Very helpful...