Hip Hop Forum

Hey Bro I Will Break This Down Later.. but I Wanted to Say I Read it b4 Work And This Was A DOPE Piece... Dont Sleep Fuckers...

Just finished reading this , & I gotta say this Fressssshhhh ! ... especially the second verse , it had so many clever lines and metaphors , it was enjoyable to read ... keep writng man .

[ Post made via Mobile Device ]

A lot of nice/funny wordplay in this piece. Especially in the second verse.

Only one time this doctor drew a love line across the air//
But people acted like broken elevators w/ how they stopped & stared//

Just one bar of many. Flow was on point. Decent multies and you stay on topic the whole time. Good shit.

Nice drop. I couldn't figure out whether you were making a reference to WW1 or not.....the title is a bit misleading.

Anyways, this ish was dope. The first and second verses were flames, the third one was reaching for the same success in certain lines but it was still good.

I could choose so many lines I liked from the first two verses....these are some that really stood out:

Hit the party scene, using warm hugs as a conversation starter//
Got her saying I’m her favorite author like my name is Faulkner//
I’m not well groomed… but this made of honor was made to honor//
Find my Serena’s or Venus, show her Saturn’s ring & make the offer//
Let me bring the ‘melo-tone-in’… spill the bottle for any dimes//
Always got the ‘ex-to-see’, but sorry… that’s a pill I swallowed too many times//
^^^Lolol that ex line had me rollin and that Melatonin play on words was ill.

Only one time this doctor drew a love line across the air//
But people acted like broken elevators w/ how they stopped & stared//
^^^That punch was vicious son

Overall, this was well written and entertaining man. I'ma keep peepin ya work.