Hip Hop Forum

as light refracts and reaches the opitical nerve/
i find it hard to see anything good in these suburb's//
same scratched grey pavement not what it deserves/
if my lifes a book, drop it, dont even read the blurb//
a book on how one person decieves himself every day/
even tho he constantly precieves, this road is one way//
since when did one get away selling killos regually/
lavished, with double pay, life better illegally//
or thats what he fort before he saw that P Van/
but ill rewind it fore you should know where it began//

from an early age, a thug, with pocket fulla drugs/
climbing on the first page, crushing these other slugs//
selling 20, 40 and sixty bags, pushing out ten ounce//
dealing to people with jaws swanging theyd mispronounce//
basic words,they want hard, so i had to step my game up/
this is where the problems began starting in a close-up//
selling white doves 10 for £20, but i wernt spreding peace//
i was killing with pills that came with a bloddy press release//
i bought a 100 for a pound a peice, doubled and made for extra profit//
making more money, i felt like i had the will of god i was the prophet/

wasnt till i got to selling that charlie and a little bit of brown/
i got to get sniffing with a face pale white, bitter, sick of this town//
to cut it short, i gained an addiction, to a lovely white pow-der//
stealing for money, a fiend, till this brain came to allow-her//
out of respect, money, without a home, i was a right mess/
but thought fuck this, ive sank so for i carnt sink no less//
started fighting for food, bare knukkle boxing for the gypsys//
my soul nearly escape, let loose, found a knoose i was bleary//
with i idea that if i let go, my problems would just disapeer/
but bang an explosion of colour as my problems collided appeared//

blacked out, woke up in prison, man i think i just hit rock-bottom/
this was the chapter that saved me but man its still a problem//
i didnt leave my cell much, i was scared of me killing someone/
its like i have a curse, i stick up for my self no im doing wrong//
i quess this is the part i tell you i found god in my prayers/
but i prayed and there was no answer, just the rustling chambers//
as they filled with cold air, and the rasps of the bigger dudes/
but my time was coming close, it was so close my story is concluded//

I liked this. I always appreciate these true personal experience kinda drops. The third verse was my favorite I think, the flow was more consistent, and it felt more emotional and the story part of that verse kept my interest real well too. I wasn't a big fan of the second verse, I think you could have expressed the ideas you where expressing in there in a lot less lines, don't think its really necessary to know how much you actually sold things for. The first verse was good, introduced the topic well, but again, maybe didn't need to be so many lines for the introduction. I think that if you had shortened verse one and two, and lengthened the story aspects of verses three and four it would have been better. But overall, this was a solid drop, nice to hear about some personal experiences...

thanks for the feed cadence