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one of my grimier pieces,, looking for some feed
i worked hard on this shit, constructive crit. is welcomed

what is the beat? I love it

I'd turn up the vocals. The flow for the most part is really good though there's some parts where you extend your words and its always been a pet peeve of mine. To be honest I'm really not feeling the chorus. Sound's weird... I think it could've been better.

The biggest problem in this in my opinion is that you sound like you're forcing your voice too much. It sounds corny. I know I've tried doing it in the past. You've got a good voice and the delivery isn't bad but you're just trying too hard. I'd ease up and not try to sound so grimey and this would be dope.

Not a bad drop at all though. I'm just pointing out the things that I think would take it from being good to being great

thanks for the feed dogg, i get what you talking about, yeah i've been working on my recording techniques, seeing what works and what doesnt.

so thanks upping

The beat is off the hook.. i wasnt expecting the type of vocals you ditched out.. it was a surprised but wasnt disappointed.. i like it.. i wasnt really feeling the hook that much.. your flow was nice, those pauses between some of the bars i didnt like.. and the pause between the 2nd verse and hook.. but other then those little minor things it was nice.. good stuff

upping this piece

This was an amazing beat, but your voice didn't match it at all...this was a great soothing beat, not something to be "grimey" on. I honestly didn't like it all, I couldn't understand a word you said and the chorus was rather annoying.

Beat sounds real good man. Good selection. Vocals, prolly need to be turned up a little bit. You sound a lil rougher than rough. Raspy, as in quality wise. Delivery i can feel, just having difficult making out your words, sounds clipped. The volume is a drastic change from chorus and verse, which is generally good, but in this case, it came out rather backwards. Chorus sounds like it'd be a filler, for a bridge. Try recording the chorus in multiple layers, and panning them to the sides to fill the emptiness. Or have one track at a higher tone, or sang "louder" further away from the mic, and panning it far left and far right, and having two more sung regularly comin a bit off the center both left and right. Its hard when recording directly in top of the beat, because best case scenario, you place your vocal center and pan the entire beat around your vocal. But since its the other way around, you have to try your best and wrap the beat with yourself, which is why you "pan". The concept and delivery is dope man, just a little rough when it comes to quality. If you dont mind answering, whats your set up?

man i got a gl65 mic and a pop blocker using Audiocity to record,

still working out the kinks, in a couple weaks ima buy some sound proofing so the vocals dont sound so echoey, but thanks for the feed