Hip Hop Forum

aint it funny how you find love in the darkest places

& can distinguish between who the real & the fake is

they say the truth is always naked

& price is wrong so you better check it

on the road of life.. they say you better never wreck your dreams

im not doing the ordinary.. im going for the extreme

the things they all dream about

lifes a rollercoaster so you better stream or shout

but its always a fun ride..never know what to say.. tongue tied

& your real emotions you shouldnt wanna hide

put your self pride to the side

& do what you feel.. remember fake things are never real

kill two birds with one stone.. lifes calling but noone has a phone

& the caller was unknown but we know who it is

lifes a unexpected test.. personal pop quiz

noone knows the answers.. wish we could be the advancers

like the technology.. sorry for my sins. think god deserves

an apology.. why study biology because are we really living

are we really winning.. all these thoughts.. my mind always spinning

straight forward ideas are always bending.. they say lifes a show

but whos attending it.. everybody pretending.. but i speak my mind

i say fuck yall opinion bitch.. feeling so relentless

whats the real rate but anybody knows the percentage

Overall, the content was promising, the only downside is that you really didn't indulge further into anything, you started off then moved on to something different. I think if you draw some of the lines a bit further out it would give you more of an opportunity to do so and will also help you build you rhyme scheme. You had a few going but it was somewhat sporadic.

Loved the ending though, packed a good punch, the last line was an ILL meta, for real. But I definitely liked what you wrote about, just need to elevate a bit more. Hope this helped bro