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Live Life

Posted: Fri Aug 12, 2011 3:19 pm
by MonuMental
Phenomenal goals meet rejection with methodical woes,
Or topical prose on feelings of abdominal growth,

Unstoppable ghosts haunting all their probable foes,
So, out the window is where canonical goes,

Ideological crows peck the eyes from fanatical souls,
Recap and slow the carnage down to a tap of the toe,

Failure happens, you know, boasting irascible holds,
Battered and cold, sign up for impractical roles,

I tactically dove into the pit of misery's depths,
And came to rest on a plateau built of hate and unrest,

The pattern of death scripted on a plaque in my chest,
Rejects matters of jest, present the latter in text,

A patter of steps, down the hall, gather, infect,
Laughter can vex a feeble mind, remodel the best,

Scattering less innocence than we claim to possess,
I'd rather impress who I am than prattle and guess,

So lather your chest with blood from a spatter of life,
Saddle your strife with a win in a battle for right,

Gamble away all the money you can't take when you die,
Ramble for days never fall from the ladder of pride,

Go or stay, love your ways, how they happen and why,
Work or play, sin or pray, even happy men cry,

A turbulent ride is promised when we open our eyes,
But burdens can slide aside by invoking our minds,

Hoping to find peace awoken, keep a toe on the line,
Holding a sign: Depression is a passage of time,

A ravaging crime, a poke with a ravishing dime,
Complication is causing all our lavish designs,

So if the damage we've exacted isn't ever defined,
We'll be sandwiched by the sickness, eternally blind,

Real success relates to the state of the grind,
So the message that I'm stating is to never rewind.

**Canonical - conforming to a general rule or acceptable procedure : orthodox.

**Irascible - Characterized by or arising from anger.

I put these here, not to insult the intelligence of anyone, but to help the overall flow of this piece by bringing a better understanding for those of us not familiar with these terms.


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Re: Live Life

Posted: Fri Aug 12, 2011 3:27 pm
by pest
dude. this was pretty fkin sikk. super filthy multies, nice vocab, good structure. the flow was a bit repetitive but good flow nonetheless.
9/10

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Re: Live Life

Posted: Sat Aug 13, 2011 2:53 am
by Defiance
you need to put down that dictionary man...
just kidding...

nah man.. this shit was dope as a mo-fucka ... wish i had time to write more these days.

but this was fyare liked the whole thing keep dropping

Re: Live Life

Posted: Sat Aug 13, 2011 2:59 am
by leeroi green
Phenomenal goals meet rejection with methodical woes,
Or topical prose on feelings of abdominal growth,

Unstoppable ghosts haunting all their probable foes,
So, out the window is where canonical goes,

dope use of multis

you know what i cant quote each bar but flow is sick structure very nice multis on point your closer was decent but went well with the rest of your content

overall i hate it

j/k fire homie keep it up

Re: Live Life

Posted: Sat Aug 13, 2011 3:03 am
by Sir Kevin O Shea
Im a fan of the flow and content you use when you write. This has amazing vocab too.

Re: Live Life

Posted: Mon Aug 15, 2011 5:43 am
by OboliskC
dude do you like have a dictionary for a brain the vocab and flow is like your screen name (monumental).your lyrical skills are awsome, bro you need to make a mixtape or something.
i feel inferior for real man. i cant write something like that on my best days.

Re: Live Life

Posted: Mon Aug 15, 2011 6:45 am
by MonuMental
I appreciate the feed, all. Dude, Ob, never down yourself for anyone, ever. Just leave feed when you wanna post something. Lol.

Re: Live Life

Posted: Mon Aug 15, 2011 2:57 pm
by 88SkyLink
As quoted by Loso... NIICCEE!! a great drop man, it had it all.

This had a complex sense of metaphorical language, and the best of all - it made perfect sense, cuz usually ppl use many vocabs unnecessarily, but your dictions were on point.

The multis were at its best, the flow was good (although a little force @ some point), and the metaphors were tight.

Overall a very strong written monu, definitely worth the read.

Keep it up.. Peace

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Re: Live Life

Posted: Mon Aug 15, 2011 3:18 pm
by vanity
very impressive! gr8 multi's, vocab n awesome flow i just loved it :)

Re: Live Life

Posted: Thu Aug 18, 2011 4:55 am
by For Real
Well, as you already know from everyone above, the vocab was on point. You never overused it, you kept it understandable and used it well within moderation, which can be hard to do at times as you can let i slip away from you. The storyline is a little vague, it's hidden behind a wall of vocab with only glances of meaning breaking through. I know the meaning is there I just found it difficult at times to really follow it. Flow was impeccable and the multies were reallyu good, with very few being forced despite the elevated rhyming vocab. Good work as always.