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Deeper Than That

Posted: Wed Dec 13, 2006 6:56 am
by drunken jesus
"Deeper Than That"
Produced by Sa-Ra for G.O.O.D. Music/Sony



i know life might seem all pretty and nice
all easy no stress, no worries
but it usually goes a little deeper than that...


shit it was all good just a week ago
inhaling reefer smoke feeling the reaper close
with every step but i was just settling debts
with the meddling pests and saw my shorty
and knew her love was all for me
but all that ain't really seem to matter now

the news hit like a huge brick smashing down
had me franic and stressing paniced with questions
didn't understand it, but now it stands as a blessing
i just wasn't ready and truthfully i still ain't really
my girl delivered the news ready to faint feeling
the anxiety herself but i couldn't contribute my blues
i had to stand strong with a hands wide but see
just like her i was scared shitless tryna bare with this
i myself only twenty and her just a year younger
already bringing new life into this world the fear running
was natural but through the stress given to girl
she survived so i was determined to go through this
like any others are relationship wasn't the greatest shit
we'd fight and cuss she'd beat the fuck outta me
nights i was drunk but i never layed a hand on her
with all that the love counted see i was the man for her
the only one that visited when i dwelled in prison
not even my homies was there she tell me shit to get the
stress outta my mind when even the doctors i saw
told me i was outta my mind thought i lost it all
but she was still there when i got released and free
so even though life ain't nice as it seems to be

i'm gonna make it
through the struggle and pain the hustle remains
deeper than that
and peeps ain't understand thinking i'm insane and i am
but its deeper than that
through the struggle and pain the hustle remains
deeper than that
so i'm gonna keep coming back

see the world is cold dude shit that we go through
makes even the sanest man wanna take the road used
by kurt cobain to get away from all the hurt and pain
i was kinda selfish with depicting the first verse
see even with all my problems she was the worst hurt
shorty had it rough since she was first birthed
no dad to care just her mother who loved and covered
but that ain't really enough sometimes shits tough
and even just recently i was with her getting stitched up
after the doctors removed all the cancer inside her
asking god why her mom cryed and he answered with silence
nothing to reply with so i realized there was nobody up in the sky with
any say on life or the shit that happens in it
and those religious don't have to listen
you don't understand my living trying find an answer fitting
to a young cancer victim asking why gods plan was stricken
with whats fitting for someone whos been damned for sinning
but she survived biopsys showed shes cancer free
so after all this we decided we'd hold hands and be
a couple for better or worse while our childs led on this earth
since neither of us had what we planned to give our child
even though shes still in denial her fathers a mason
she won't admit with this how bothered it makes him
but i don't don't give a fuck and she don't either
he wasn't there when she was a young lonely kid
so if he don't like me he won't see this kid growing either
we'll just hold together our love as it stands homelyness
she ain't have a dad and neither did i or a mother either
so our only bliss we've come to see is giving this child
as much as we can so it feels love and understands
so even though life ain't nice as it seems to be

its deeper than that
through the struggle and pain the hustle remains
deeper than that
and peeps ain't understand thinking i'm insane and i am
but its deeper than that
through the struggle and pain the hustle remains
deeper than that
so i'm gonna keep coming back




8th if you bitch about a link i will eat your parents and shit out your brothers and sisters, i posted feedback on 95% of the threads in this forum

Posted: Wed Dec 13, 2006 7:41 am
by Momeijah
LoL Word. Overall it Was Dope as Hell But i Liked The 2nd Verse Better Cuz it's Like 'Hit The Nail On The Head' And u Explained it Brilliant With Flow So Yeah. i'll Give it Like 8 n a Half Outta 10 Cuz The Only Flaw Was a Few Lines Didnt Rhyme But im Guessin u Meant it 2 Be Like That So Word.

Posted: Wed Dec 13, 2006 7:51 am
by drunken jesus
good looking out homie, yeah i don't follow any specific pattern when writing so some rhymes aren't easy to see cause i don't rhyme just the end of bars

Posted: Wed Dec 13, 2006 8:45 am
by Viral
"8th if you bitch about a link i will eat your parents and shit out your brothers and sisters, i posted feedback on 95% of the threads in this forum"


LOL!!...tooooo funnny...hahahahahaa....yeah dis shit was pretty tight...id like to hear it on audio for sure

Posted: Wed Dec 13, 2006 9:06 am
by drunken jesus
word up 8th keeps trying to spread his communist ideology on me but i ain't budging

it'll recorded as soon as i get a better computer, this piece of shit has trouble running aim

true story too btw

Posted: Wed Dec 13, 2006 10:14 am
by 8th
8th if you bitch about a link i will eat your parents and shit out your brothers and sisters, i posted feedback on 95% of the threads in this forum
LOL. yeah, i know you feed on basically everything.

ill feed later, that was just funny to me.

and how dare you call me a good for nuthin commie? were talked politics before, its clear im not a red diaper baby.

Posted: Wed Dec 13, 2006 11:02 am
by drunken jesus
if i can't post without a link THE TERRORISTS HAVE WON!!!

Posted: Wed Dec 13, 2006 11:55 am
by 16 Micz
lol well, title is relevant, the beginning was a lil weird, threw me off a lil where u switched up the rhyming but i still liked it, as far as the story and topic i liked it as well, and i also enjoyed how you used simple words and still made the bars ill, something ive been trying to accomplish for a while now..nice drop though.

Posted: Wed Dec 13, 2006 12:25 pm
by drunken jesus
yeah i did the beginning like that on purpose cause of the break in the beat, i'm suprised you're the first one who commented on that, and yeah i do the rhyming like that on purpose internet rappers tend to focus too much on vocabulary you can rhyme the most common of words and be the illest rapper ever, overusing vocab in pieces may impress canibus fans but the typical fan and rapper alike will feel the same piece if its wrote with a less complex vocab

Posted: Wed Dec 13, 2006 2:59 pm
by Street Pharmacist
this was nice kinda was thrown off in the begginin but i cought on to it.

Posted: Thu Dec 14, 2006 12:00 am
by complexity
and those religious don't have to listen
you don't understand my living trying find an answer fitting
to a young cancer victim asking why gods plan was stricken
with whats fitting for someone whos been damned for sinning
but she survived biopsys showed shes cancer free
so after all this we decided we'd hold hands and be
a couple for better or worse while our childs led on this earth
since neither of us had what we planned to give our child
That was my favorite part.

I thought the hook and title were ill as fuck. I like how, your like this is to much to handle but im going to handle it type of attitude.

The story never went off track. I was right into it for every line, waiting to see what happened next. The art of a good writer.

I'm happy this was written all the way out. So you can record it. It would be a shame not to.

Some sad shit though. I of course like the ever changing rhyme scheme.

I guess the only thing I could possibly

I really don't have any problem with the verse. Like ghost said which I thought was brilliant "no verse will ever be perfect". So I could probably find something. But I think this one is ready to record.

Posted: Thu Dec 14, 2006 1:26 am
by ~Symbolikull~
thanx complex

but yo! this shit was tight as fuck, as real as it comes, i liked the feelin and truth behind your words. shit was ill dawg...

in the first verse i thought the endin was the best outta it, but the whole thing satyed on formula and subject.

nights i was drunk but i never layed a hand on her
with all that the love counted see i was the man for her
the only one that visited when i dwelled in prison
not even my homies was there she tell me shit to get the
stress outta my mind when even the doctors i saw
told me i was outta my mind thought i lost it all
but she was still there when i got released and free
so even though life ain't nice as it seems to be

the second verse kicked off the conclusion and keeps you wantin to read more to see whats next. dude you gotta unique skill to tell a story of love, hate, and the love and painit takes to creates new life.

in the second verse the beginnin jus set it off right.

see the world is cold dude shit that we go through
makes even the sanest man wanna take the road used
by kurt cobain to get away from all the hurt and pain
i was kinda selfish with depicting the first verse
see even with all my problems she was the worst hurt
shorty had it rough since she was first birthed

overall it was a ill as fuck, the rhymes scheme fell off here and there, and some lines didnt connect wit each other, but maybe its jus the way i read, you seem to know what your doin, and to agree wit everyone id like to hear this audiod..

Posted: Sat Dec 16, 2006 11:48 pm
by Invincible
fucking pansy....naw it was alright deep metaphor or personal experience