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Creativity Vocab And Flow.. PT 1

Posted: Mon Jun 18, 2007 7:20 pm
by MesaR
I Spit A Slow Motion Flow, Thats Way To Hot-To-Witness..
Blessed With These Words, And No One Can Stop-The-Sickness..
Your Styles Whack, But Im Like A River With My Fluent- Raps..
Go Right Through Cracks, And Squeeze Through-Its-Gaps..
You-In-Straps? No Not Guns, I Mean Like a Leziban Chick.
Playing With My Dick, Wataching A R Rated Porno Flick.. < Haha
I Have A Vivid Mentailty Packing Information Into My Brain-Waves..
With This Complex Vocab You Would Swear We Were The Same-AGE..
Im "Untouchable" Like A Force And You Cant Brake Through...
Sparking Gases And Solids Witch Combine And Make Liquid And Fluids Two.
This Rap Game Is Working For Me Ill Be Living A Illustrious Life Soon.
Stabbing At Your Carrer With A Blunt And The Rustest Knife In Tha Room..
My Raps Are " Crazy ' So It Takes More Then A Institution To Tame-Them..
Masterd The Path Of this Now The Fire I Spit Just Reflects On The May-Hem






Sequence..

Posted: Mon Jun 18, 2007 7:48 pm
by LadySam
this was cool. i didnt liek the lesbian line lol. better vocab than what you usually have. get working on pt 2 lol

Posted: Mon Jun 18, 2007 8:17 pm
by B-Bear
it had some dope lines seq, def, but rappin about how good u are aint workin for me man, it gets boring after a while.. but other from that this was a good piece, i see some elevation, especially when it comes to vocab and multies.. structure was good and flow was straight.. buuut got a feelin of u experimentin tryin to find a proper style man, am i right?

Fav:
You-In-Straps? No Not Guns, I Mean Like a Leziban Chick.
Playing With My Dick, Wataching A R Rated Porno Flick.. < Haha
I Have A Vivid Mentailty Packing Information Into My Brain-Waves..
With This Complex Vocab You Would Swear We Were The Same-AGE.

Posted: Mon Jun 18, 2007 8:36 pm
by кℓαѕѕιιcк
lol Nice man i
Liked the lines Which b-bear liked
gud Stuff man
thx 4 tha help and the rest

Posted: Mon Jun 18, 2007 8:39 pm
by кℓαѕѕιιcк
AND BTW MAN
THEY ARE PRETTY KOOL RYMES
LIKE FROM A 13 YR OLD THAT SHIT IZ DOPE
WELL MAN U CAN MAKE ME LAUGH
LOL

You-In-Straps? No Not Guns, I Mean Like a Leziban Chick.
Playing With My Dick, Wataching A R Rated Porno Flick.. < Haha
I Have A Vivid Mentailty Packing Information Into My Brain-Waves..
With This Complex Vocab You Would Swear We Were The Same-AGE..

THATS THE SHIT MAN

Posted: Mon Jun 18, 2007 9:06 pm
by Momeijah
Đóפмαŧi¢ Đεlu§ióŋαlli§Ŧ says:
are u a faggot?
___ I Put Spinners On My Priavte Jet, Now I Cope A New Yahot, When Ever Mine Gets Wet __ says:
Yes.

Posted: Tue Jun 19, 2007 9:50 am
by Ambiguous Realm
first 2 bars were decent as well as the 2nd bar b-bear also liked.. i wasn't feelin that porno flick line... just stick to the multis, that seems to be ur strongest aspect lyrically

overall i'd give it about a 6/10

Posted: Tue Jun 19, 2007 10:44 am
by precise
not bad, your still gettin better step by step, this was good cause it did flow, nothin was too forced, it was hot in the beggining, but i did find it starts to slip near the end a bit, but good job man, keep it up

Posted: Tue Jun 19, 2007 9:01 pm
by T-Stylez
Yea pretty good. I dunno if theres elevation cuz i didnt see anything else of u really... And yea the multies are pretty good but they can be better.

Keep droppin n get pt 2 working son

by the way... the fuck happend to ure reputation lol

Posted: Tue Jun 19, 2007 9:03 pm
by MesaR
Thx For The Feed, Upping

T Man I Dont Fuckin Know Lmao..

Probley Domihoe fuckin it up or something

Posted: Thu Jun 21, 2007 6:04 pm
by complexity
The same age line was pretty good.

Overall these were definitely decent punches, but nothing to impressive.

I don't really like the multis.

They aren't forced to the point of T-Stylez, but they still don't come across very clean.

I suggest listening to some Jadakiss and Fabolous. Their styles are very consistent with what you're trying to accomplish.