Hip Hop Forum

Posted: **Thu Jun 05, 2008 2:44 pm**

A year ago i never wanted to
Wake up.Because i didn't have you
Why should i see the sun shine
The moon's tears are the same kind

September 3rd, 2007 is when my heart
Mourned no more. I found my missing part
Who knew that you were in front of my eyes
Since you. My truth as no more unforgivable lies

Call us young, but we're not dumb
We know the cure to each others numb
It's me and you vs the whole population
You give me a whole new elevation

For now on. It's just the two of us
I thank heaven for i am very blessed
You're my life. My only bride
For now one its 2008 Bonnie and Clyde

Posted: **Fri Jun 06, 2008 5:37 am**

aiight well it was ok i don't really like poetry
although i like rap(LOL)
but this was not bad
keep'em comin

Posted: **Fri Jun 06, 2008 6:11 am**

thanks UPPIN!

Posted: **Fri Jun 06, 2008 6:16 am**

This Was Straight.
You Should Of Made it More Hittin...
Like Put More Feeling Into it..
i Understand Its a Poem But U Gotta Write Why U Still Need Her..

Keep Droppin. Take Constructive Critism Well Aight?.,

Posted: **Fri Jun 06, 2008 8:08 am**

yeah i know what your sayin. i just wrote that on the spot. but ill write one with alot of emotion in and you can see my true talent. and tell me where i stand

Posted: **Sat Jun 07, 2008 1:51 am**

uppin

Posted: **Sun Jun 08, 2008 4:33 pm**

ne one? lol

Posted: **Mon Jun 09, 2008 12:42 pm**

Who knew that you were in front of my eyes
Since you. My truth as no more unforgivable lies
^^ nice part just fix up the second line to make more sense

i like it, ur def better at DCs then rapping
which is not a bad thing because so am i
i felt emotion in this and i actually read the whole thing
waiting for more of these

Posted: **Mon Jun 09, 2008 2:23 pm**

thanks means alot comin from u