Hip Hop Forum

http://www.illestlyrics.com/board/quick ... t9277.html

okay jus being bored so i wrote sumin Nice 18 Bars
If a lost sold becomes old and writes-rap
let a story be told let this unfold so i can recite-that
the fact i take ya rep-back,cautios like a prepped-cat
ready to go fuckas better step-back,so respect-facts
stickin our neck out to protect-rats
we didnt know they were rattin us out now we gotta neglect-prats
dont know where homies be kept-at
dyin from guns cause G's select-stacks
pay da hitman he's comin to-get-ya
thrust me this guy aint gone forget-the
fact he's been payed to track-u-down
from the G Mac-in-town
you better not slack-around,attack-wit-hounds
packin-pounds the glock rackin-sounds
not lost back-n-found,strap-a-mound
on ya body,guns check back-n-round
entance and exits to get drug-addicts
thug-matic(LMAO) this crazy slug-static
a gun poppin off in a dead-house
a red-mouse shot in the head he was head-spouse
now his brother take-control
thugs rake-parol,while stakes-are-sold
bets are in but fakes-are-old
i'm cold blooded like snakes-are-cold
playin poker some states-will-fold
givin up cus my mates-are-bold
jus like my rhymes the race-is-on
pace-this-con,like cops a case-is-gone
cold turkey bull shit heavy metals-born
the devils-sporn,hide the rebels-porn
shit this shit is a crazy-rap
lazy-crap,cant get topical so phase-to-that
get rid of the evidence erase-da-mac
bodies filled wit lead raise-to-cats
as i end this i feel-hollowness
please to bite or steal-follow-this
so as i spin-wit,sin-shit,win-bits
to get money to fin-it
LOL

Damnn...Hot Ass Drop Multi's Was Most Definatly Killin'Em....Flow Was Short An Smoothe Ya Best Drop So Far 2 Me..., Flow Coulda Been Longer Tho Kinda Takes Away From The Story Tho...By eah Its Ya Best Drop...

lol pretty decent multies, altho to be honest alot of it didnt make alot of sense n some of the words ive never heard before lmao, but i guess thats why the verse is so aptly named

keep writin man youve got potential,

thanks fo da feed precciated

only advice i'd give you is that you don't really need to point out the multis. I'm sure everyone here already knows what they are and recognizes them as they read your verse. You shouldn't have to point-them-out-like-this or bold them to put emphasis on it. Other than that it's cool. Stay up

i dont do it to point them out i jus do it cus i think it looks better