Welcome to Illest Lyrics forum established in 2005.
----
Free Vapes

broke is it tis isnt it thowe bitniz

Drop your written rhymes in one of the largest collections of original rhymes on the internet. The feedback in our Written Rhymes section will simply amaze you.

Moderators: Loon E Lou, Enlightend

Post Reply
User avatar
skidONE
Rookie
Offline
Posts: 3
Joined: Mon Sep 20, 2010 11:05 pm

broke is it tis isnt it thowe bitniz

Post by skidONE »

when i amplify you wont i catastry that youve done but havnt made one complete with hesitent scars a cat with claws a bob cat with paws and everyone at a pause with the mouth going aww......blind and viben my talent go co neat and my strive like strisan eat ya in sands my lyrics meet man create the breath of a titan when my soul molecules myst to a fresh trident.....throw up a cop eash select the next verb...my ghosts come out the herds with herbs and try to slang to my girls contiouse on the mantle and on curbs theirs no recolection whos yours...youth is comen and why you dubben my mixtapes is a hustlen my neck broke spinnin beat breaks for tusslen i was obscure of the muzzlen talking about who was terrorist in the lounge last weak was a musslim....
User avatar
QwarterZ
Rap Professional
Offline
Posts: 1688
Joined: Thu Oct 29, 2009 7:01 am
Wins: 4
Losses: 9

Re: broke is it tis isnt it thowe bitniz

Post by QwarterZ »

LMAO!!!!!!!!!!!!

I stopped after the first sentence or line...or whatever the fuck it is
mu'fucker you made me LULZ seriously that make you go awwww lmao!!!!!!
this kid is cool in my book, you a crazy lil' mofo!!!
User avatar
FlipSide
Flow Creation
Flow Creation
Offline
Posts: 1473
Joined: Fri Mar 19, 2010 9:37 am
Wins: 0
Losses: 0
Location: Chicago IL
Contact:

Re: broke is it tis isnt it thowe bitniz

Post by FlipSide »

These Dudes Refuse to give good critque And Expect Elevation... First of all Break Ur Verse Down Into Bars So That We Know When One Line Or Idea Ends And The Other Begins...PLEASE DO THAT ASAP... Cuz i Got Lost.. Seems U One Of Them Cats Thats Spits Off The Top From The Way You Write. Make Shure U Get One Idea Out With Out Mixing It In With another. U have the concept of making it rhyme... Just work on Making The Rhyming Phrases Have Matching Syllabl;es and U Got A Multie.. Also Work On Your Metaphores.. And Some Words Were Spelled Like ur A 3rd Grade Drop Out... Might Wanna Look Into That.. Other ThaN that.. develop and put some effort into it and ull be good
BANG BANG!!!! I Shot U Down
̿ ̿'̿'\̵͇̿̿\з=(•̪•)=ε/̵͇̿̿/'̿'̿ ̿ -
Image
User avatar
TheNobleOne
Elite Freestyler
Offline
Posts: 340
Joined: Mon Sep 06, 2010 12:12 pm
Wins: 3

Re: broke is it tis isnt it thowe bitniz

Post by TheNobleOne »

yeah i definitely agree with what flipside said. organizing your bars is the first step allowing people to follow and make it for an easy read. if you have no structure then you really have nothing. so just work on tightening up your bars and keep tryin homie. holla.
User avatar
Lawgix
The Aphilliated Assasin
Offline
Posts: 4214
Joined: Thu Sep 21, 2006 3:25 pm
Wins: 14
Losses: 8

Re: broke is it tis isnt it thowe bitniz

Post by Lawgix »

deaf shady????
Don't Let The Game Make U, Make Urself

Lawgix

Illest Radio

Image

"Sometimes You Gotta Stand By Your Failures To Recognize Your Success" Joe Budden

pest wrote:You look Easy... Whats Good?
AntiMaTTer wrote:lmao ...is this how you hit on all the chicks?
Post Reply

Return to “Written Rhymes”

Who is online

Users browsing this forum: No registered users and 0 guests