A little somthing I've just thrown together (it's 530am)

[32neilz]

Voices in my head, evilness is spread, why be good instead, gotta squeeze the lead/ they say crime never pays, but it does in many ways, plan to be as rich as the krays/ undefeatable, unbeatable, leave a bad taste in ur mouth- uneatable/ I eat emcess like a three course meal, u no the deal, I bust the steel, how's it feel?/ I got sick songs, so bring it on, no time to play games, cos that shit is just long/ so step up and take ur best swing, I'm the king, can't beat me, I do my thing/ I do it very well, songs to ysell, deals to sign, u get urs and I'll get mine, with the nine/ dangerous if let loose, find mcs hanging from trees, neck in noose, I'm wrecking yous/ barz, I got many, sell u my thoughts for a penny, or a pound, undisputed, I'm the best around//

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[M33Kish]

This sounds lyk a battle verse but dope anyway.

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[Immortal Jav]

pretty dope considering the fact it was 5:30
but wasnt nothing that spectacular. but i was feeling part of it

[FlipSide]

Uhhhhhh.... ok first of all theres is no structure. the rhymes are simple with not many metaphors. When you are writing you have to keep the readers attention with word play metas and multiple rhyming syllables. I see you were doing this late and its a quick drop, it was ok. Just be more creative with what you write. Pick a topic or something.

[Shawnmd]

Yea your kinda everywhere but thats kind of expected for 5:30. I suggest you pick a direction for your next post.

[32neilz]

Will do man, cheers for the feed

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