Welcome to Illest Lyrics forum established in 2005.
----
Free Vapes

Superstar

Drop your written rhymes in one of the largest collections of original rhymes on the internet. The feedback in our Written Rhymes section will simply amaze you.

Moderators: Loon E Lou, Enlightend

Post Reply
User avatar
DaPrince
Rhyme Master
Offline
Posts: 208
Joined: Mon Oct 26, 2009 11:50 am
Wins: 1
Losses: 1
Location: TX

Superstar

Post by DaPrince »

Chorus:
I'ma do it til there's none left
I'ma do it til my last breath
Give me a mic...I'm checked up
Give me a stage...I'm steppin up
...I'm Ready, I'm Ready, I'm Ready
To be a Superstar

Verse:
A refined Artist, my rhymes are the smartest
My mind's on the grind, every time a beat's imparted
Compete and you'll be slaughtered, you can be a martyr
Every line is divine, it's like my flow is Holy Water
I'm developing a strategy, my lyrical mentality
creates something magical, like alternate realities
the unparralled majesty, while I'm craftin-these
Gift-wrapped tapestries, to burn would be a travesty
Greatness drafted me, so I'm headed for the peak
An acclaimed MC who Made a Claim with game unique
It's plain to see, that I aim to be
The best thing cuz my self-esteem is leading me
I'm seeing things that have been lately featuring
these weaklings, appearing right here on every other team
I'm dreaming and scheming, the best thing I'm believing
Every beat is a reason, I'm T-H-E-B-E-S-T
I'm the Best, I'm fiendin for the top
I'm the cream of the crop, believe every thought
exceeds everything that you got
I'ma superstar I'm like Kobe yall
I got skills I ball and I ain't failing at all
I'm assailing the flaws until mistakes are a myth
I'm the path to get rich with wisdom dipped into rifts
I'm killing this shit...riddle me this
My skills are lyrically sick and heal like pills with quick wit,
It's ridic, I'm unfit for you dimwits,
my mind's twisted like gymnasts,Perfected like sin-less
a blessing to witness, Testify I'm terrific
like surprises I'm gifted cuz my mind's just so different

-- Wed Jan 13, 2010 3:21 pm --

Anything?
Last edited by DaPrince on Tue Jan 12, 2010 8:24 am, edited 1 time in total.
I don't drop rhymes all the time, but when I do, I prefer to spit fire
User avatar
Gizmo Duck
Potential Emcee
Offline
Posts: 41
Joined: Tue Jan 12, 2010 8:04 am
Losses: 2

Re: Superstar

Post by Gizmo Duck »

lol , some great lines in there, i loved the beginning.
Image
User avatar
DaPrince
Rhyme Master
Offline
Posts: 208
Joined: Mon Oct 26, 2009 11:50 am
Wins: 1
Losses: 1
Location: TX

Re: Superstar

Post by DaPrince »

Preciate the feedback, drop a link to what you want me to look at
I don't drop rhymes all the time, but when I do, I prefer to spit fire
Haz
Supreme Lyricist
Offline
Posts: 6800
Joined: Mon Dec 18, 2006 1:41 am
Wins: 67
Losses: 70
Location: The Port

Re: Superstar

Post by Haz »

Chorus:
I'ma do it til there's none left
I'ma do it til my last breath
Give me a mic...I'm checked up
Give me a stage...I'm steppin up
...I'm Ready, I'm Ready, I'm Ready
To be a Superstar

Sounds Good.



A refined Artist, my rhymes are the smartest
My mind's on the grind, every time a beat's imparted
Compete and you'll be slaughtered, you can be a martyr
Every line is divine, it's like my flow is Holy Water

Haha .. Smooth As Fuck Yo, multis on point


I'm developing a strategy, my lyrical mentality
creates something magical, like alternate realities
the unparralled majesty, while I'm craftin-these
Gift-wrapped tapestries, to burn would be a travesty

Came out Raw ..

Greatness drafted me, so I'm headed for the peak
An acclaimed MC who Made a Claim with game unique
It's plain to see, that I aim to be
The best thing cuz my self-esteem is leading me
I'm seeing things that have been lately featuring
these weaklings, appearing right here on every other team

Weak Point.


Every beat is a reason, I'm T-H-E-B-E-S-T
I'm the Best, I'm fiendin for the top
I'm the cream of the crop, believe every thought
exceeds everything that you got

Exceeds what you got. ?


I'ma superstar I'm like Kobe yall
I got skills I ball and I ain't failing at all

ball play nah.


I'm assailing the flaws until mistakes are a myth
I'm the path to get rich with wisdom dipped into rifts
I'm killing this shit...

Going hard..


My skills are lyrically sick and heal like pills with quick wit,
It's ridic, I'm unfit for you dimwits,
my mind's twisted like gymnasts,Perfected like sin-less
a blessing to witness, Testify I'm terrific
like surprises I'm gifted cuz my mind's just so different


Way To Exit The Building Lmfao .. Good Shit



Overall i Liked This Drop your a Above average writer.

Stay Up N Keep Dropping.
Image
User avatar
Dana Riot
Dedicated Emcee
Offline
Posts: 79
Joined: Fri Jan 15, 2010 5:15 am

Re: Superstar

Post by Dana Riot »

Did you write this to a beat? It was easy to catch the flow on this and you had some dope multis scattered all over the place, some kinda just looked like they were thrown in there cause ya needed to use em though. When it got closer to the end the rhymes sometimes came out a bit awkward and switched the flow, but by the looks of it it's one of those pieces that would sound ill when spit right out loud instead of on paper. Good goin, keep at it.
User avatar
DaPrince
Rhyme Master
Offline
Posts: 208
Joined: Mon Oct 26, 2009 11:50 am
Wins: 1
Losses: 1
Location: TX

Re: Superstar

Post by DaPrince »

Yea it was written to the beat of Defeat Is Not an Option by Jae Millz and the flow changes up when the beat does. I appreciate the feedback.
I don't drop rhymes all the time, but when I do, I prefer to spit fire
User avatar
QwarterZ
Rap Professional
Offline
Posts: 1688
Joined: Thu Oct 29, 2009 7:01 am
Wins: 4
Losses: 9

Re: Superstar

Post by QwarterZ »

An acclaimed MC who Made a Claim with game unique
It's plain to see, that I aim to be
The best thing cuz my self-esteem is leading me
^^^^^^that was dope for me
I like this whole joint, it really got a smooth vibe to it
I need to hear that beat tho'....otherwise I'm diggin' this style you usin'
it seems to suit you! keep writing!
User avatar
Riggz
Rap King
Offline
Posts: 887
Joined: Thu Nov 05, 2009 3:41 pm
Wins: 16
Losses: 8
Location: Atlanta, GA
Contact:

Re: Superstar

Post by Riggz »

JJ- your flow was impecable.. easy read this was. You didn't have outstanding lines, but this is one of those verses that would just be killer to a nice mellow beat. Sorry I slept on this man.

excellent opener too.
ILL Flow - thieves-vt15638.html
aka aL-b
"SHMUKS"
REBIRTH of the FIGHT CLUB... Say it with me!
User avatar
DaPrince
Rhyme Master
Offline
Posts: 208
Joined: Mon Oct 26, 2009 11:50 am
Wins: 1
Losses: 1
Location: TX

Re: Superstar

Post by DaPrince »

Thanks for the feedback bro.
I don't drop rhymes all the time, but when I do, I prefer to spit fire
User avatar
JHaze
Lyrically Inclined
Offline
Posts: 134
Joined: Thu Nov 20, 2008 7:34 pm
Wins: 3
Losses: 4

Re: Superstar

Post by JHaze »

yea this is tight bro nice rhyme schemes and flow, i agree with a lot of the feedback above, some clever lines too good shit man keep droppin
Glamtrash
Poetic Juggernaut
Offline
Posts: 1498
Joined: Thu Nov 22, 2007 3:42 pm
Wins: 0
Losses: 0
Location: Where the Treetops Kiss the Stars

Re: Superstar

Post by Glamtrash »

This was pretty good, kid. Flowed well and structured nicely. There is%mt much else i can say that hasn't been said yet, and my feed is limited due to this piece of shit phone. But good shit dude, keep droppin

[ Post made via Mobile Device ] Image
User avatar
Brah-Vo
Rap Professional
Offline
Posts: 1713
Joined: Thu May 03, 2007 7:28 pm
Wins: 1
Losses: 14

Re: Superstar

Post by Brah-Vo »

This was a solid piece. Didn't blow me away but a piece that'd make someone say "Damn, this guy can write".
And damn, you can write. Keep up.
Aka Raiza Sharp, R.A.I
Post Reply

Return to “Written Rhymes”

Who is online

Users browsing this forum: No registered users and 5 guests