what it is

[~Symbolikull~]

im thinkin of quittin, sick of remenissin im drowin in what there sinkin a ship in,
a fifth is what i need to drink to begin wit, i intelligently verbalize no link to forgive it,
i gave it all of my heart, spit flames ona mic, like, i swallowed a spark,
idk y but u sawed it apart, its like u oughtta restart but ur confused on auto remarks,
how do i react? gotta think so i sit back n vibe to the sounds of a track,
let the bass pound in the back, get amp, set ina switch stance, yea now to attack,
hold up calm down, wait a minute, fuck what to do, all i know is the game is finished,
ustream is how u wanna relay ur business? ughhhh thats cool too i was "ur homie" but play it fiction,
i cant help that workins my hustle, i havent done any tracks, now im burstin ur bubble?
the pieces fall apart so im observin this puzzle, diss me u get dissed what u think im worthless n humble?
nah,,, ima speak my mind, but i was gettin into a war i guess, n i was creepin blind,
never thought we would see demise, but cuss me out, im like fuck im out, beefin time?
i wont let it come to that, its thru n im rushin to daylight like a runnin back,
maybe ill find a better way lol fuck his track, wrote 3 verses, recorded it then dumped the track,
it was illy, but see willy, i ain vindictive or childish like that, u feel me?
still he, fuels his fire till v, i, is fired but its all love dude dont stop till u make that milli!!!

[complexity]

im thinkin of quittin, sick of remenissin im drowin in what there sinkin a ship in,

[I'm surprised that you didn't flip that line, gave me a ship to sink in]

a fifth is what i need to drink to begin wit, i intelligently verbalize no link to forgive it,
i gave it all of my heart, spit flames ona mic, like, i swallowed a spark,

[Nice]

idk y but u sawed it apart, its like u oughtta restart but ur confused on auto remarks,

[The rhyme at the end really killed the momentum that you gained from telling us why we shouldn't be critics]

how do i react? gotta think so i sit back n vibe to the sounds of a track,
let the bass pound in the back, get amp, set ina switch stance, yea now to attack,
hold up calm down, wait a minute, fuck what to do, all i know is the game is finished,
ustream is how u wanna relay ur business? ughhhh thats cool too i was "ur homie" but play it fiction,

[I'm sensing a subliminal!]

i cant help that workins my hustle, i havent done any tracks, now im burstin ur bubble?

[Alright, punch could have been a more "amped"]

the pieces fall apart so im observin this puzzle, diss me u get dissed what u think im worthless n humble?

[Not a strong rhyme to end on]

nah,,, ima speak my mind, but i was gettin into a war i guess, n i was creepin blind,
never thought we would see demise, but cuss me out, im like fuck im out, beefin time?
i wont let it come to that, its thru n im rushin to daylight like a runnin back,

[Sweet]

maybe ill find a better way lol fuck his track, wrote 3 verses, recorded it then dumped the track,
it was illy, but see willy, i ain vindictive or childish like that, u feel me?

[Nice]

still he, fuels his fire till v, i, is fired but its all love dude dont stop till u make that milli!!!

[Alright]

The story was good. I have a decent understanding of what happened through your lines alone, that's nice though, the worst part of this piece was the rhyming, I thought a few times that you just went with the motions and didn't stop to assess the rhymes you were using, more like a freestyle, and less like a deliberate written. That isn't always bad though, and I'm not hating on it.