got bored so i wrote 2 this and did a lil remix to it. the song can't help but wait by trey songz.tried steppin away from the whole 'deep stuff' and into some r&b i guess lool leave ur thoughts and a link.peace
http://soundclick.com/share?songid=6707106
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Cant Help But Wait Remix
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Embed your soundclick video players with [soundclick]Song Id[/soundclick]. You can also just put [soundclick]Embed Code[/soundclick].
Please go back and fix as many of your old songs as you want.
Embed your soundclick video players with [soundclick]Song Id[/soundclick]. You can also just put [soundclick]Embed Code[/soundclick].
Please go back and fix as many of your old songs as you want.
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wasnt bad but had a nice flow
The Eagerness Is Putrid My Fluids Acid Leaves You Vexed Like Black Holes
Your Inept To Correct Stretched Like Fat Folds Perplexed Like Castro
I'm So Tenacious With Rhymes Sensatious So Patient With Lines
While You Fill Your Writtens With Filler And So Stay Vacant In Mind
I'm Amiable But Too Your Haters I Appease Your Arcane Admissions
Dark Games No Vision Your Avarice Lead To Scarred Shamed Partitions
So Callous In His Candor You Have To Coerce For Neglect
For Worse Or For Best I'm Confidant With A Verse Of Respect
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Your Inept To Correct Stretched Like Fat Folds Perplexed Like Castro
I'm So Tenacious With Rhymes Sensatious So Patient With Lines
While You Fill Your Writtens With Filler And So Stay Vacant In Mind
I'm Amiable But Too Your Haters I Appease Your Arcane Admissions
Dark Games No Vision Your Avarice Lead To Scarred Shamed Partitions
So Callous In His Candor You Have To Coerce For Neglect
For Worse Or For Best I'm Confidant With A Verse Of Respect
!!ILLEST MINDS!!
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Wasn't too bad. Wouldn't go as far as to say you we're made for R&B-type joints, but then again...R&B tracks are really hard from a presentation standpoint.
Sure...the lyrics are a lil easier to write because with the whole melodic style it allows you to stretch lyrics, thus writing less words, but it gets hard when you have to be able to hold notes and sound in-tune.
But I will say this...you're getting better in your creativity and attempts of presentation. I hear you using "doubled-up" vocals more and adding ad-libs and expressions in the background. And that's good! Alot of hobby-artists, new artists & underground artists tend to forget the importance of those little perks and vocals tricks. They add so much to a song and give the over-all presentation a more 'complete' feeling. So I'm glad to see you exercising that more cuz you never did in your earlier audios.
1 bit of constructive critisism I will add though. When you use those lil "Uhhs!" as space fillers in the song...be more natural with it. When you use that expression...it's more or less used to express how much your vibing with the beat. When you do it so mono-tone as you tend to do in this particular track...it makes it sound abused. It's stales the track. You don't want to put things in your track that sound expressionless. You want to make urself sound like your really feelin it. Cuz if you can make urself sound like your feelin it to the listeners...they're gonna pick up on that vibe and feel it too. No what I'm sayin!? You don't wanna fill a song with a bunch of "Uhhhs", "yeaa's", and "uh-huh's" unless it's a natural feeling and it sounds natural!
Sure...the lyrics are a lil easier to write because with the whole melodic style it allows you to stretch lyrics, thus writing less words, but it gets hard when you have to be able to hold notes and sound in-tune.
But I will say this...you're getting better in your creativity and attempts of presentation. I hear you using "doubled-up" vocals more and adding ad-libs and expressions in the background. And that's good! Alot of hobby-artists, new artists & underground artists tend to forget the importance of those little perks and vocals tricks. They add so much to a song and give the over-all presentation a more 'complete' feeling. So I'm glad to see you exercising that more cuz you never did in your earlier audios.
1 bit of constructive critisism I will add though. When you use those lil "Uhhs!" as space fillers in the song...be more natural with it. When you use that expression...it's more or less used to express how much your vibing with the beat. When you do it so mono-tone as you tend to do in this particular track...it makes it sound abused. It's stales the track. You don't want to put things in your track that sound expressionless. You want to make urself sound like your really feelin it. Cuz if you can make urself sound like your feelin it to the listeners...they're gonna pick up on that vibe and feel it too. No what I'm sayin!? You don't wanna fill a song with a bunch of "Uhhhs", "yeaa's", and "uh-huh's" unless it's a natural feeling and it sounds natural!
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